Tuesday, July 16, 2024

The Mail’s Sarah Vine asked why anyone would go to Europe on holiday and was owned into next year

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To the Daily Mail now – no, stick with us, please – where columnist Sarah Vine – we said stick with us! – has been thinking about her summer holidays.

Specifically, why anyone would want to go to Europe for their hard-earned break from the relentless grind of work.

Why indeed, Sarah? And these people were only too happy to oblige.

And just in case she still hadn’t got the message, this person was particularly happy to help out.

Oh for god’s sake, @WestminsterWAG at it again.

Why would any of us want to go on holiday to Europe ever again, she asks with disdain at about 27 countries because… well… who fucking knows?

Either way, if you haven’t realised by now, I cannot let a question (especially a stupid one) go unanswered, so here are a few reasons I might just consider wanting to go on holiday in Europe, despite the horror that it inspires in our dear Ms Vine.

The Sun: Because who doesn’t love vitamin D? Unlike the grey skies of Blighty, European destinations offer actual sunshine. Not that pale imitation we get occasionally but the real deal that tans your skin and lifts your spirits.

Culture Overload: Europe’s got this tiny little thing called history. From the Colosseum in Rome to the Parthenon in Athens, it’s like walking through a giant, open-air museum. But I guess that’s nothing compared to a weekend in Slough, right?

Cuisine: French pastries, Italian pasta, Spanish tapas, Greek moussaka… But sure, let’s stick to fish and chips and pretend it’s Michelin star quality.

Wine and Cheese: France, Italy, Spain – they know a thing or two about making and appreciating wine and cheese. But by all means, let’s raise a toast with a lukewarm pint and some cheddar.

Festivals: La Tomatina in Spain, Oktoberfest in Germany, the Carnival in Venice – Europe knows how to throw a party. But who needs that when we have the local summer fete?

Scenery: The Swiss Alps, the French Riviera, the Tuscan countryside – nature’s masterpieces. But of course, nothing beats a stroll around the local retail park.

Romance: There’s a reason why people flock to Paris and Venice to propose. The ambiance, the charm – it’s palpable. Just like the magic of a night out in… Stoke-on-Trent with
@GullisJonathan
serenading you?

Ease of Travel: Despite the best efforts of Brexit, Europe is still relatively easy to get to, with short flights and no need to navigate time zones that leave you jet-lagged for a week. Because who wants to spend 12 hours on a plane to find sunshine when you can be in Barcelona in two?

Now, don’t get me wrong – the UK has some truly stunning places. The Scottish Highlands, Cornwall’s beaches, the Lake District – they’re all fantastic (genuinely no snark there).

But sometimes, a change of scenery, culture, and cuisine is just what the doctor ordered.

So, Sarah, while you might find staying within the UK’s charming borders appealing and are happy to self confine to Westminster and nowhere else, some of us enjoy the broader horizons, culinary delights, and cultural riches that Europe has to offer.

Byyyeeee!

Beyond the call!

And finally, a particularly NSFW point of information …

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